When pain, comparing yourself with others, school, work, marriage, hopes, maybe church relationship, or life in general behave un-explainable ways, what is your response?
Personal unmet desires might even write our own story.
How did Leah respond to her circumstances , her pain. Her own emotions for the man she cared for were taken advantage of by her own father into a deceitful maneuver in exchange for seven more years of work. The beautiful sister always received the delighted eyes of the man Leah loved.
God has not forgotten Leah. The answer to her cry ultimately releases her inner pain. Her choice also has an eternal gain greater than Leah could hope for.
Walk deeper into Leah’s life. Is Leah’s choice talking to you?
” This pain is deeper than before”, Leah remarks to herself while spinning wool to repair a blanket. Memories of this tent come flooding back. Two years ago, in a drunken stupor, Jacob made Leah his wife. Not in love but through deception. Each time Leah receives a look from Jacob, she feels hatred. She believes it reflects un-forgiveness for being part of a cruel plot with her father.
Rachel and Jacob tenderly still share the same affection as their first day of marriage. Leah feels as a shadow in the tent whose only need is to keep things clean and tidy.
“Please look at me Jacob with the same heart, the same delight the same enjoyment as when you look at Rachel. I can make you laugh. I can give you joy. Give me a chance.”
God hears Leah’s cry.
31 When Yahweh saw Leah was unloved, he made it possible for her to have children, but Rachel had none. 32 Leah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Reuben [Here’s My Son], because she said, “Certainly, Yahweh has seen my misery; now my husband will love me! Genesis 29 NOG
Leah cries out in bearing the first born, opening her womb. Although never experiencing anything this painful before, but it is not the focal point of her mind. With tears, she welcomes this son as a gift to Jacob.
“Here Jacob, Love Me!!! Here’s My Son. Surely I have a tender place in your heart now.” Leah hold this first born as an offering to Jacob.” Please, love me”, is her plea..
Jacob swells with pride as he holds his first born son.
Jacob’s response to Leah?. Leah who?
33 She became pregnant again and gave birth to another son. She said, “Certainly, Yahweh has heard that I’m unloved, and he also has given me this son.” So she named him Simeon [Hearing] Genesis 29 NOG
Oh the pain of this second birth Ahhhhhh. Leah cries out hard. Women surrouding to help bring this baby into the world. Upon his entry, Leah declares, this one is more difficult so the prize must be worth it. Simeon is very beautiful . Surely Jacob will know I can bring joy to his life now.
Have things changed?
“Don’t I Exist?” These words explode inside. “Will I forever go unnoticed as my sons are taken from me as well?” Leah exclaims . The three males in her life are playing a game outside. Jacob’s loud laughter booms. Leah hears the joy and sees the playtime but goes unnoticed while still spinning yarn. “Yahweh, please turn Jacob’s heart to me”.
The enjoyment with her boys is over. Jacob’s eyes light up even more when Rachel opens the flaps of the tent. He grabs her hand. They run to the hills like young does. Giggling follows. Leah weeps.
34 She became pregnant again and gave birth to another son. She said, “Now at last my husband will become attached to me because I’ve given him three sons.” So she named him Levi [Attached]. Genesis 29 NOG
This easy birth released a fine boy. Still clinging to the hope her salvation to Jacob comes through children, Leah believes Jacob will finally yearn to become attached to her.
Jacob proudly starts bringing Reuben and Simeon his work.” These are my sons” Jacob shows the two eldest the beginning in caring for the sheep. In the evening, Jacob returns and gently rubs the head of Levi who is navigating small movements for his first steps. Nothing has changed. The boys bring Jacob delight. Rachel brings Jacob delight.
Leah is empty with no delight.
35 She became pregnant again and gave birth to another son. She said, “This time I will praise Yahweh.” So she named him Judah [Praise]. Then she stopped having children. Genesis 29 NOG
Used, Imperfect and Unloved! Leah could not draw delight from a man. Leah declares “This time I will Praise GOD.”
Judah is a son having far reaching blessings.
Who is Judah?
Matthew 1 1-17, and Luke 3: 23-34 state the lineage of Jesus. Jesus goes to David who goes to Jacob who fathered Judah. This is the child Leah declares in finding her fulfillment :I will Praise God. .
Another expression of eternal gain not only for Leah but for the world is mentioned in Revelation.
“Do not weep! See, the Lion of the tribe of Judah, the Root of David, has triumphed. He is able to open the scroll and its seven seals. Revelation. 5:5. NIV
From the used, imperfect and unloved, God chose to draw His Son, our salvation. Leah made the choice:
I WILL PRAISE HIM!
What response will come from you, from me?
You may ask if Leah had a wonderful life after that? The opportunity to experience life differently is always a day to day choice. Which path to take for a fulfilled story is your exciting freedom. How will you write your story?
Please feel free to comment where you experienced the world’s standard placing you in a box for joy. Have you accepted that box for your story?
Have you walked in victories by opening your hand to say :I Will Praise Him?
My box: Find a job, make money, be happy. That. I think, is a box I’ve made for myself. I’m slowly breaking out of it and learning to trust Him with that area =)
Recognizing the box and declaring ” I WILL PRAISE YOU” , is a first step. The choice to praise God first, opens our eyes to freedom in many areas.