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Why Don’t I Feel Better?

I am going to bring you into one of my thought processes. The day it self way quite delightful. The weather was great (for Duluth).


Sunny,

Warm,

Gentle Breeze.

This made my walk an enjoyable part of my spiritual discipline as I prayed. After I returned home, I prepared a cup of coffee, got my book, journal and went to the deck. I was going to continue seeking God’s heart for mine. Sounds as though it is a time to soothe one’s soul.

Enjoying a nice cup of coffee in the morning.

Please don’t get the idea I am a “super Christian” with a great spiritual discipline all packed down and this post will give you hints as to how to begin your day all neat and tidy before you head off to your creativity. I want to bring you into more of who I am so you will understand my writing. (also don’t wait for the super Christian part. That is not happening. 🙂 )

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Today, I am telling you the BEST PLANS do not always make the emotional facts. I am a TYPE Four on the Enneagram. I did not understand why my internals were not lining up with the externals. I did not feel as though everything was working together for good for me. ( even though I do love the Lord. Roman 8:28)

I was still contemplating the information I gathered from the Does God Really Love Me? series we just finished from Easter Sunday. ( I am His Adopted Child, I am Truly Loved, I am His Masterpiece, God actually enjoys Loving Me and spending time with me). I was searching His path and seeking His heart for me. What is next Papa? Looking to not from.

What is the around the bend?

You would think this wonder and depth and anticipation would bring an exciting way for me to greet the rest of that day. WRONG!!!

This is more of how I felt inside. There may be a path, but all I could see was blurry broken woods.

Even though all of these externals lined into what could have blossomed into a great day, I did not FEEL great.

WHY?

Was I bad? Did I miss something? Was my walk with Jesus on a downward spiral after such a fantastic experience?

I can have strong emotional pulls. Life may seem very good when things are going in a nice direction. Not so hot when heading the other way. Even if nothing is really going wrong I may have emotions questioning my worth, creativity, am I even loved?. It is good to be aware when those turmoils start churning inside of me. My best response is not to deny them or shame myself in them. Rather, recognize they are there and go to God with them. The wonderful, accepting love of the Father will not judge, condemn or criticize those feelings. As I was honest with Him, I could receive His gentle love. My ears were open to hearing His words to me “I Understand”.

Creatives, spend time with God each day to get His perspective concerning you. The deeper you know Him, your eyes will know creativity in a deeper way. He knows you. He made you. God knows the best way to speak His heart through the art He has given you.

GOD REALLY LOVES ME! GOD REALLY LOVES YO

It was after I spent time being honest with God, in my feelings, my emptiness, my searching, with no expectations that I needed to respond in a certain way to receive His approval, I was able to go back to the bible verse and take in the whole blessing for me.

Sit, RECEIVE, REFLECT AND RESPOND (however your creative genre takes you) to this gift.



Romans 8:28
We are confident that God is able to orchestrate everything to work toward something good and beautiful when we love Him and accept His invitation to live according to His plan.

Taken from THE VOICE

God is protecting me and always walking with me? How do you feel?

BE

FREE

TO’

WORSHIP

AS

YOU

WERE

CREATED!


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